I guess I should say I'm sorry

I guess I should say it

I guess I should show it

I guess I'm not what you imagined 

I guess I have failed you darling

I guess you don't see yourself in me

I guess you don't like how I do things

I guess you knew better than that

I guess you mistake me for your past

I guess I know I should be yours

I guess I cant because I wont

I guess you know I should be free

I guess I know it was meant to be 

I guess I should say I'm sorry

I guess you would admire it

I guess I will stay quiet

I guess you are crying

I'm sorry I'm sorry I guess I'm really sorry

I love you I really do but I don't want to like you 

the day i found love

the day i found love i met you for the first time

that same night i saw you as my life reflected upon your eyes

the day i found love we were sitting across one another

the same night we spent eight hours inside a car

the day i found love you gave me your number and my insides turned

the same night i knew i had met my one for sure

the day i found love i had spent an entire day thinking about you

the same night we held each other tight singing love songs

the day i found love you told me i was your best friend

the same night i knew i was forever blessed

the day i found love we took off and drove away

the same night i knew it was never a mistake

the day i found love we held hands for the first time

the same night we kissed and felt all those butterflies

the day i found love i remembered my previous night

the same night we had sinned and were satisfied

the day i found love it was December 31 and you were away

the same night you left me a voice mail saying I was your first 

the day i found love we baked brownies and cuddled away

the same night i caressed the soft skin on your face 

the day i found love we were crying on each others shoulders

the same night we said "fuck the world, lets love each other"

the day i found love i was thousands of miles away

the same night i missed you every second of the day

the day i found love i went to sleep thinking about you

the same night i hoped i would dream of you

the day i found love i saw your face again

the same night i couldn't believe i was holding you again 

the day i found love we didn't care about anyone else

the same night we shared a room, a bathroom and a plate

the day i found love we did everything together

the same night we made plans to make one life forever 

the day i found love we fought and hated each other

the same night we knew we were crazy about one another

the day i found love we struggled to fight for us

the same night we knew it would be a long way home

the day i found love others knew and didn't smile

the same night we accepted us and whatever came along

the day i found love mistakes were made and we were lost

the same night we knew we would never be alone

the day i found love i slept alone in my bed 

the same night i missed you like i never had before

the day i found love you came to me from miles away

the same night we escaped and took the world by its horns

the day i found love i realized no one can compare

the same night we said, lets get along

the day i found love i saw you and saw my soul mate

the same night we said, you will forever be my always 

the day i found love was the same night i saw you for the first time. 

Week 1-Let’s talk about food.

Where to begin? I have never felt so at home since I left Cuba August 5, 2001. Even surrounded by, what seems to be a highly populated area, I feel like I belong. Aside from the fact I understand very little Italian, It feels good to be here. It feels great to live a life style that asks little of you, yet fills you up so much. The concept of “Less is more” has never made so much sense, especially when talking about food. In Cuba, people spend most of their time trying to make a living, and that usually means having a plate of food on their table. In the United States, life is not as hard. But we are constantly surrounded by superficial need that translates into “The bigger, the better.” We correlate the idea of more with satisfaction. In Italy, people are not necessarily concerned with the amount of food placed at the table. Instead, their focus shifts to a more humane and universal need: happiness. This happiness is achieved by good company and good food. Every meal is another opportunity to relax. They seem to forget the worries, the problems… and to remember what is like to appreciate the little things in life while enjoying an irresistibly delicious meal.

I came to this country with the intensions to become as Italian as possible, without forgetting my native roots of course. As a matter of fact, my Cuban roots have played a major role in my acculturation process. The little understanding of Italian that I have would have not been possible without my Spanish background. But to continue, part of this transformation led me to the Mediterranean Diet. A diet based on fruits and vegetables, carbs, olive oil, meat and dairy in moderation, and wine with meals, so delicious! Aside from these ingredients, one must keep an active life. Easy right? Absolutely. People here seem to be doing just fine. The olive oil aspect of the diet was very hard for me to understand. Coming from a place where we are put under the understanding that any oil is better off avoided, it took me a while to fully accept its importance in the diet.

 Italians take their fruits and vegetables very seriously. I was able to experience this in my first visit to the open market. A market set up in a large area filled with tents containing all kinds of foods. Foods varying from different cheeses, to spices, all types of fruits and vegetables, breads, nuts etc… I loved walking through all the tents, smelling the freshness of everything, smiling at people and seeing how they interacted with one another. It was truly an amazing and very lively experience. Not just because I love food, but because it was a little piece of the Italian culture that I was taking away with me. As I was tasting and trying everything, I was absorbing every moment. I was learning about measurements, talking and understanding Italian—trying actually.  Being exposed to such environment, really made me feel at home. It made me happy to be surrounded by fresh foods.

The day continued with a trip to the indoor market, where people can purchase things like milk and other refrigerated items, as well as any other foods found in the open market. As I previously stated, everything here seems to be a lot smaller than what I am used to. The market was no different, even the food carts fit this descriptions. Comparing them to the average size used in the U.S, the Italian carts were approximately four times smaller. This really caught my attention, in a very positive way. This minimalist idea, is very resourceful and essential in a realization that I personally think is often taken for granted in the States. Across the Atlantic Ocean, we are so consumed in living in abundance. We live in a present that is not preparing for us for the future. For example, we go to the market and buy as much food as possible. Some people even walk out of the market with two carts completely filled. To start off, most of these items are not fresh foods, hence the reason why they last so long, and two, and last, are probably not consumed because it goes bad or just forgotten they were even bought in the first place. But it is this idea of just having enough to last us a long time and save us a trip to the grocery store that attracts the American society.

Here, people seem to be very aware that resources can only last so long and therefore adapt to their future. So, instead of buying enough food to last us a month, people buy their foods on a daily basis depending on how much they plan use. I find this method to be very efficient and rational. Food is less likely to be wasted or forgotten and stays fresh. Though it may seem to be more expensive, it might as well be equivalent to the American method monetary wise, but better in practicality.

This first week was very important, as it was my first immersion to the Italian culture. There was a lot of learning and adjusting. But being open minded and willing to accept new ways of living was my key to success. I knew I would love the European way, I knew I would love the food, the people, the history in every corner, and everything else. So far so good, and I anxiously wait for all the other great moments coming my way. 

That time of the year...

12 days of Letters and Love

a Forever

In a blink of an eye, a forever has passed and an eternity has lived
In a blink of my eye I have seen a reflection of me lived upon thee
Over thinking makes me wonder, makes me question the possibilities
What are the chances? How "lucky" are we to find a friend within?
A forever will explain, a forever can be lived.

Numbers don't add, words can't express, thoughts are vague but I understand
That time has done its job, everything is right and nothing grows wrong
Nothing has been so known yet the chemicals have proved us wrong
I know because... I know and I have never known the unknown but
A forever will explain, a forever is that strong.

I have lived it and I have seen it for now I know what I was missing
I no longer wonder what it could have been because the present shall be lived
There is more to life, than the eye can see and it was proven by finding thee
Never imagined another me, never believed it could ever be
A forever will explain, a forever will take us there.

Happy tears through my face and an untamed smile is all I share
In a blink of an eye you arrived into my life and made yourself be

You are my best friend and I love you.
If you ever second guess yourself, come back to this page.

Perfect Advice

This is something i found on the web. Definitely the Perfect Advice for a Perfect Balanced Life. 

Health:

1. Drink plenty of water.                                                                           
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
4. Live with the 3 E’s - Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy
5. Play more games.
6. Read more books than you did in 2010.
7. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
8. Sleep for 7 hours.
9. Take a 10-30 minutes walk daily. And while you walk, smile.

Personality:

1. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
2. Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
3. Don’t over do. Keep your limits.
4. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
5. Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.
6. Dream more while you are awake.
7. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
8. Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
9. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don’t hate others.
10. Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
11. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
12. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
13. Smile and laugh more.
14. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:

1. Call your family often.
2. Each day give something good to others.
3. Forgive everyone for everything.
4. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
5. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
6. What other people think of you is none of your business.
7. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:

1. Do the right thing!
2. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
3. However good or bad a situation is, it will change. 
4. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
5. The best is yet to come.
6. Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

Maybe today...

I don't know why it has taken me so long to write again... I was never scared to share my feelings or be judged by them. Almost 8 months since my last post and i definitely believe time has done it's job. What do i mean? Well, ideally as time passes, people grow, mature, change physically and mentally. I think that's the point of life. Though my body has relatively stayed the same-a few pounds more a few pounds less, my mind seems to be going through puberty just like my body did when i was twelve. I wonder if maybe I didn't write because i didn't find my life interesting enough to be worth sharing and therefore by not writing i was unconsciously avoiding people. And the truth is, if i feel i don't have anything good, like really good to say, then most of the time i wont say anything at all. Maybe those same stories that didn't have any spark were the ones i was hiding from my family members and closest friends. Maybe those were the same stories i was trying to neglect... and pretend they were nothing else but untold stories, stories to be unread. Today was a different today. Today was a good day. Good enough to trigger something within myself that made me wonder and question why I had not written again. So i thank today for the events that happened, both good and bad. I thank the people that made me dance and smile. I thank life for being a learning experience and making everyday a priceless blessing lived only once on this earth.